Why does it have to be something dramatic everyday in order for me to write things into my journal? How come I can never keep up with this?

Well another year at school is over and most of my friends that I started with are graduating this year and I have yet another semester to go with 4 classes. It kinda sucks but considering that I have a decent job that teaches me what I need to know to open up the bar I guess it's not so bad. I hope I will be a full time manager by the time summer's over so I can just take part time school and graduate by may.... Hmmm graduate from college by the time I turn 24 I guess that's not too bad....

It's summer time, I guess that means party every weekend... Hopefully I'll make enough money to get out of this credit car BS and start really saving up some money. I can't wait to go to Vegas in July and I don't care what people say I'm still going to Cancun if not anywhere else that has perfect weather and beautiful girls. hehehe.

Mae and I were going through some rough times but it's going pretty well so far although I really can't see myself being with a girl that short I guess I'll have to wait and see if this is something I really want in my life. Hmmm it's 1AM and I'm still at work and I have to be back here by 9 tommorrow I guess I should get going. Good to be writing in my journal again... who knows when my next entry will be, until then, best wishes and lucks to me.

Just got back from a wedding...

106 degrees... what the hell was I thinking taking jeans and dress shirts.... I ended up buying stuff I already had back home...

Jason's married, it's kinda scarry, although I'm happy for the guy I can't believe my friends are actually getting married. I have little kids calling me "uncle" and I don't even have a clue as to what I'll be doing within next year or two.

I started researching the whole bar idea, researching the price of the liquer licence in the city, getting different ideas about the floor plan and hoping to come up with the name of the place within the next year.

I think jorie and I would make a great team, so far it's working out great and with his ambition and energy along side my business minded personality it might just work out. Besides he's almost the exact opposite of me when we go out, it's good for me, I think he has a lot to offer to me.

Life right now for me is very systematic, there's no suprise or anything out of the blue. I wish sometimes I would wake up in the morning not knowing what to do, where to go and who I was going to meet.

School starts soon so may be things will change.

Or may be VEGAS..????

Hmmmm.... I'm starting to get scared... My second mortgage payment is due... I've been working six days a week and I think I"m going to barely make this month's payment, granted that I went home last weekend and wasn't able to make money it still is very scarry that I have to live every month check to check.

I was thinking if I was still living in that studio and I was making as much money as I am making now I would have about an extra grand in my pocket every month that would have been sweet. But instead I have to write a phat check every month and start all over from almost 0 dollars.

I'm only scared because I know that summer school starts in about two weeks and I don't know if I"m going to be able to handle both school and work. Especially because I know for a fact that i have to do well in school to get the heck out of there.

I never thought I would graduate with what I am probably going to graduate with. I guess that's why people always say "you never know what you are going to do with your life until it happends." I'm excited to get back into school knowing that I will be getting out soon.

I also need to start going to church again. I realized that I was a lot happier and my life was more clear when God was in my mind constantly.

So many things to do, so little time and so many things I want yet no money to buy.

Life kinda sucks.

Is it crazy that I'm trying to reconsider this whole SFSU thing? is it too late in my life to start my college career over? Or do I want to do something with my life that I know for a fact that I am going to be proud of?

It's going to be tough there's absolutely no doubt about that, but if I can wake up at 4:30 in the morning to go swimming, or wake up at 6 in the morning to go to work and count money what then is stopping me from getting my ass into the bart and finishing up school?

I want to be able to hangout with people and meet other people without having to be ashamed of what school I go and where I graduated from. That is definately not something I want to live with for the rest of my life. I need to get started right away in remolding B.C.'s mind.

Here's to the new begining.